option pricing models.

my self-confidence is often on the high end, sometimes to the extent that others and i can both agree that i'm too full of myself. but this is hardly the case when i have to deal with option pricing models - they are so evil that they have the dark power to make me lose faith in myself almost entirely. 

3 years into my business specialisation, i should be quite familiar with option pricing models because they pop up every now and then. there were certain points of time when i thought i understood them (like last year, when i had no choice but to do well for my binomial option pricing quiz to make up for the 1.5/20 score obtained for the first derivative quiz), but those moments of accomplishment didn't last long. because of this, i'm now as lost and confused about option pricing models as if it were my first encounter with them.

i believe that now is probably the time when i understand banking and finance the most in my entire life, since i've spent the entire revision week on nothing but banking and finance. sadly, being at this peak doesn't necessarily equate to understanding option pricing models.

spy.

so the one-month spy mission has unofficially ended, and i've learnt so many things this month, much more than what i'd have learnt in school for one year. not only did i manage to acquire almost all the necessary knowledge and learn the important skills, i also had the opportunity to observe life from a very different angle - from the perspective of people who only make about 1000 dollars a month and can barely survive in this expensive nation.

despite having to wake up at the most unearthly hour of the day to go to work and standing for the whole day in an area of less than 10m2, they always smiled and helped one another without expecting anything in return. thanks to my pea size, i was never asked to do anything beyond the amount i could handle and always showered with care and concerns. even though i was often a hazard to the people around me, my colleagues always thought i was very helpful and thanked me for every little thing i helped them with. and the most amazing part is that we communicated really well most of the time (yeah, there were some misunderstandings here and there), given my limited command of chinese!

one month isn't a long time, but it is enough for me to form certain bonds to these people. even though i must admit that i couldn't wait for the mission to end so that i could turn my biological clock back to normal and get back to my usual life, it wasn't easy leaving. but well, life goes on! what i've learned and observed has taught me to be thankful for what i have now and i promise i will do my best in everything!